Saturday, May 8, 2010
Smile and Wave
After a month of thinking I had done my child a huge disservice by not working harder on his letters and sounds, I had his preschool parent teacher conference. James started preschool halfway thru so timewise he was already "behind" all the other kids that had been there the whole time. To my great releif (had to keep back tears when the teachers were talking) they said that he was a great kid and he was right where he needs to be. They said he behaves well in class, follows directions, plays with others kids great and likes to try new things. As a single mom I get a lot of advice and with that some critisism. (sp) Im not able to spend the time Id like due to our custody agreement, which works out well, so to teach him all the things a stay at home mom or even a two parent family can is impossible. He likes learing new things and I know that the time we have together is well spent. I have limited TV (and for that matter he likes to watch religious focused movies anyways) and turn down the music while were driving so we can sing silly songs or talk about important things like why he has to eat green beans. :) Being a child with divorced parents he has some special needs. He has done a great job adapting and I know that this is because of the quality of time I spend with him. We have lots of things we are always working on. When I came to the point when I thought he was behind in his letters and sounds, I felt that I had spent too much time having him learn about the Book of Mormon stories I've been working on. I felt guilty. I had a hard time deciding if my guilt was right or not. In our time, I agree that it is important for our children to learn the things to funcion in the world...but is is more important to put these things first? They are going to have to learn to read and write to function in the world, but at 4? Either way...Im going to continue to teach James his letters, numbers and everything he needs to know to enter kindergarten in a year and a half, but Im going to also teach him what we are told to teach our children. About the Bible and Book of Mormon. While I want James to be over the average mark in education, I want him to grow in the understanding of the scriptures. So, while talking to the preschool teachers, they gave me some great advice. Every child is going to learn different things, lots of parents are going to have expectations and suggestions for you...just remember that you are his mother and you know whats best, so just smile and wave. :) James is great, he's perfect and he's MINE. He always tells me that when he grows up he wants to be an astronaunt, fireman, police officer and a preacher. I think were on the right track.
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I love that! I'm so glad the teachers were able to give you some added confidence that you're doing a good job. Everyone's lives and circumstances are different, and each of us as parents tries to do the best we can with what we've been given. You're right, he will learn to read and he will do great...but teaching him about God is a HUGE part of the success he will have in all apsects of his life. You're the mom and you know what he needs, remember that! (It's funny you would write about this today since I had a conversation with a few other moms about people criticising their decisions for their kids and we came to the same conclusions...God is helping them and everyone else can be ignored when needed!)
ReplyDeleteYou're right. Just like every kid crawls, walks, talks at their own pace. So too, they learn academic skills at their own pace as well.
ReplyDeleteLisa, I read the fret and worry between the lines of some of your FB posts, and I think about myself when I was a young mom. I fretted and stewed about everything. I loved my child so much and wanted everything to be just right. I look back on it now, and I know I should have relaxed a bit more about how he was doing in certain areas. I'm so happy to see your efforts that you're writing about here - like teaching him to love the Lord and filling his life with wholesome and Godly things. It's just the daily bumps that sometimes stress us out. :)
Thanks you guys, its really nice to read your comments. Just today I heard that again. Someone brought it up to me that teaching James the Book of Mormon lessons should come second to teaching him other things. People!!! Its ONE day a week!! But realized that one is not going to understand the value of it if their mind and heart are not directed towards God. They just wont. So....ill just remain patient. What the kicker is, is that incoorperating writting skills and other basic learing ideas in the BOM lessons still isnt good enough. I just dont get it.
ReplyDeleteYes, well when he gets in school you'll find that they not only do reading, writing and arithmetic, they also do "enrichment" activities that help them be well-rounded little individuals with some interesting information swirling around in their little heads, and not just spewing forth a bunch of letters and numbers. That's what makes a quality education - taking something interesting and incorporating the nuts and bolts into it - gives them an incentive to learn and some good skills as well. If you don't have that, then you don't have much of a school. So . . . you're already doing that, and that's cool. It's what a "real" education is all about - you're just using a religious topic to do it with. Good for you! He gets the best of both. :) Can you tell I'm passionate about this?? Yes.
ReplyDeleteI think you are doing a great job. I don't "see" you with him. But I can see by your actions that your heart is in the right place. That's the most important part. Let God help you with the rest.
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